Friday, February 02, 2007

If the word fuck offends, skip this post

So who the fuck was the useless fucking shitbag city engineer that decided to send out trucks to plow the fucking road during fucking rushour? Friday is the one fucking day a week when the rushhour traffic in the morning is semi-fucking decent, and they put out fucking plows. So then it takes an hour fucking longer to get to work. I deal with this stupid fucking traffic every other day of the week, why did they have to go and fuck up my friday too? And there are lots of other people out there far more impatient than I. Thus all the fucking accidents this morning, creating an even worse fucking mess for the rest of us to deal with. For fucks sake!

At one point the plow took an exit and the traffic sped up, kind of. It would have been better if the useless fucking idiot in front of me decided to drive faster than fucking 80 in the fast lane in a 100 zone. Useless fucking twat. And suprise suprise, when I pass him, it's a little old asian woman who can't see over her fucking steering wheel. It's called the fucking slow lane woman. Or don't drive in rush hour. Fuck, don't even drive at all, get the fuck off the road.

Oh, but then another plow decides to get back onto deerfoot infront of me, so I'm sitting there, again, driving less than my speedometer even fucking registers. Once again because some useless fucking city fucking engineer decided that rushhour is a perfect time to plow the fucking road. So fuck off you useless fucking shitbags.
And suprise suprise, there is another accident. Some dumb shit impatient fuckhole couldn't find his fucking breakpedal in time to stop behind the useless fucking asswipe that is the person in front of him and runs into him, casuing him to hit the guy in front of him, who then decides to run into the cement barrier in the middle of the fucking road. And it gets even better. By the time I get to the accident they are starting to clean things up, when one of the cars that is all smashed to shit and is sitting perpenfuckingdicular to traffic rolls out and almost t-bones the car in front of me. So it's rolling across the road, stopping our already slow fucking progress and the cops and tow trucki driver have to run out and push the fucking cart back across the lanes of traffic and hook it up to the tow truck. Why the fuck didn't they do that in the first place? Or, even better, why the fuck didn't someone put it in park, or put the fucking parking break on. USELESS FUCKING PIECES OF FUCKING SHIT ASSHOLES! ARGHHHHHH!

Why the fuck do I even live in this fucking city? Why can't I live in fucking Yellowknife where the only reason you are late for work is because you are hung over and slept through your alarm. Seriously, this is just fucking stupid. How can the pros possibly out weigh the cons? Why are there so many fuccking people living in cities? It doesn't make any sense. Fucking society. Fucking culture. Fucking everything.

And I woke up feeling that today was going to be a good day. I left 30 minutes earlier so I could get to work early and get some e-mails out, I was happy that it was Friday and traffic would be good. Now I'm just right fucking pissed off, and I have a meeting with this useless asshole of a fucking IT consultant whose job I'm taking over, and who thinks he's better than me and is all full of fucking attitude, and I have to deal with this fucking co-worker from another office whose been with the company for like 15 years, and knows lots, but is a royal fucking asshole and I'm going to fucking lose it one of these days. There is this woman in our Edmonton office who is one of the rudest fucking women I have ever dealt with, and everytime she calls for my help I want to fucking strangle her. I told her yesterday to be a little more polite, but she just ignored me. Next time I'm just not going to help her. And this fucking woman in my office who everyone tiptoes around because they dont' want to get on her bad side or something is being a royal fucking pain in my ass. She tries to act all sweet, but is a coniving bitch, and I have no patience for her and her antics, and she doesn't like that. Fuck her. Fuck all these useless fucking shitbags. Let me do my fucking work without all your fucking bullshit.

Words of the day: fuck(ing) and shitbag

2 comments:

Proud Military Girlfriend said...

I must say, "BRAVO!", beautifully written! I will agree with everything you wrote (even if it is just to make you feel better...or to put a smile on your face :D) Oh, but that "lady" in Edmonton and that "lady" in Calgary....FUCK FUCK FUCKERS FUCKING SHITBAGS DAMNIT GAH!!!! ahhh, much better...Good Luck Sweetie! :D

Anonymous said...

Let us not forget my personal favorite:

Fucking clownshoe cunts

I need a fucking rant post today too...I think you have inspired me, thank you Thexy XD
-Stacey